Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation. Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky as you hold firmly to the word of life. And then I will be able to boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor in vain. But even if I am being poured out like a drink offering on the sacrifice and service coming from your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you. So you too should be glad and rejoice with me. Philippians 2:14-18
What a command to live by! Do EVERYTHING with out complaining, so that we can stand apart from the world, just like stars shining in the night sky. Eyes will be drawn to us. Even if I'm being poured out like a drink, I'm going to rejoice, because it is not in vain. WHAT?!
So, let me fill in the gaps between the last post in this one and why these verses mean so much to me right now. First of all, there are thirty college students who are being poured out like drink offerings right now in Branson, MO, hiding the book of Philippians in our hearts. Second, the command to not complain or grumble is especially difficult because over the past few weeks, work has become hard to be motivated to "serve wholeheartedly, as if [I] were serving the Lord, not men. (Ephesians 6:7) I've begun to work really long hours and physical exhaustion is hard to overcome. People began to annoy me, even just the little things that I should be used to by now, like not making eye contact with me or asking how my day was going began to take root in my heart and make me want to grumble about all day long to anyone who would listen. But, when I would feel this bad, the Lord provided the sweetest customers. One guy about my age walked into the Ribhouse and looked me straight in my eyes and asked me how I was doing, even before I asked him! Another customer later that day asked me about my name and wanted to know where it came from. Another one wanted to hear why I was in Branson this summer and what the program was that I was a part of. Even the littlest things, the Lord uses them to bless me with. It's especially convicted me of how how I treat the people I come in contact with, both when I'm working and when I'm not. Wherever I am, I want to be a light and use opportunities to do whatever I can to make that person's day better, never worse. I'm learning, in little steps, ways to shine like stars in the universe.
Fellowship within the program is absolutely incredible. Philippians 2 also talks about being united with Christ and loving each other with His love. I've experienced this in spurts, but never in such a close environment where we are truly all striving and challenging each other in our walks with our Abba. Yesterday especially was a picture of what it is to be a daughter of the King and a small glimpse of what eternity will be like. Yesterday, we split the group, and the boys had Man Day (which was chanted and will be continued to be chanted, I'm sure, any time the boys feel particularly manly) and the girls had Woman Day. We began the day off with zumba and then moved from that to a talk about intimacy with Jesus. The story in Luke 10:38-42 of Mary and Martha touched my heart because of the realization that so much of the time, I'm just like Martha. I so badly want everything to look good and clean for Jesus, because that's what He deserves. I want others to see my life and see it as a life that has Jesus in it and that I'm squeaky clean because I have it all together and know what Jesus wants with my life. But that's not what should be happening. Jesus wants me to come before Him, vulnerable and broken and HONEST. In "A Praying Life", a book that we're reading this summer that is currently rocking my world and view point on prayer, made the point that Jesus purposefully goes out of his way to bring attention to the little children that he is around. He wants us all to be the way that little children are, honest, blunt, and fully trusting and reliant of their parents. I want to pray like a little child and see my Daddy as my protector, but also as someone that I come to with everything without shame and without fear. He wants my heart. My whole heart.
Thank you all for all your prayers for me. I feel them and am encountering Jesus in so many new ways, and I know that's due to your . He is shaping my mind and heart and my soul is being bent towards Him so that all I can do is live for Him. If you could, please lift up my coworkers and a lady named Roz who I shared the gospel with last week on an evangelism challenge. She seemed really interested, and I'm praying that she will recognize that her heart and life was only made to worship and glorify Him. I've had really good conversations with some of my coworkers, but I need prayer that the Lord will provide opportunities to show love and speak truth into their lives. It's so amazing to be used by the Lord and feel His faithfulness.
I love you all!
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Excited
A week and half has passed. A week and a half has passed? A week and a half has passed!
It's been so wonderful so far! Jesus has proved himself faithful once again in my weaknesses and provided me with so many blessings. Since last Sunday, I've met thirty beautiful people and begun our journey of growth this summer together. I've started my new job as a cashier at the Ribhouse at Silver Dollar City. I've gone canoeing for three hours down the Buffalo River, on which we turned backwards six, yes six, times on the rapids, but never flipped. My hands and knees got really sunburnt. I've had to forget my physical comforts and get up continuously early in the morning to encounter my Abba and then move from that to putting on a floor length dress to head out into 90 degree weather. (It's actually surprisingly not that bad. Although this could be due to the fact that I am in shade and have a fan pointed on me at all times..) I've gotten called Sheree many times, because that is the name of my roommate. I've learned how to share the bridge with people and gone out on Branson and attempted evangelism around town. I've had to learn how to climb gracefully up and down from the top bunk. I've begun to memorize the book of Philippians. In other words, I've had a lot of new experiences!
It's amazing to me that it's only been a week and half. My team is incredible. It's so amazing to see God's work so clearly through the girls that he put me with for the summer. We are all fairly different from each other, but are bonded together through our common love for Jesus. Everyone in the program is so eager to learn about how to be trained as warrior for Jesus. It's a contagious environment: one that has awoken me to my own lack of trust in Christ and see that HE is the ONLY thing that matters and will ever matter, and people's souls are real and being fought for and are worth my extra time to share His love intentionally and that it's dumb to be afraid of being thought of as odd. I'd rather be thought of as odd for my compassion and overflowing love from Jesus, than forever regret the moments that I could have spoken truth and love into someone's life. Regardless of this, it's amazing to understand the depth of Jesus' love for me and that he actually wants to work through me to bring others to him. What have I ever done to deserve the honor of seeing someone's eternity change before my eyes?! Incredible.
I'm incredibly excited for this summer. I have about eight more weeks left here in Branson, and they will continue to be stretching, but I am yearning to grow and be challenged, which has already begun to happen.
"And how can anyone preach unless they are sent? As it is written: 'How beautiful are the feet who bring good news!'" Romans 10:15
It's been so wonderful so far! Jesus has proved himself faithful once again in my weaknesses and provided me with so many blessings. Since last Sunday, I've met thirty beautiful people and begun our journey of growth this summer together. I've started my new job as a cashier at the Ribhouse at Silver Dollar City. I've gone canoeing for three hours down the Buffalo River, on which we turned backwards six, yes six, times on the rapids, but never flipped. My hands and knees got really sunburnt. I've had to forget my physical comforts and get up continuously early in the morning to encounter my Abba and then move from that to putting on a floor length dress to head out into 90 degree weather. (It's actually surprisingly not that bad. Although this could be due to the fact that I am in shade and have a fan pointed on me at all times..) I've gotten called Sheree many times, because that is the name of my roommate. I've learned how to share the bridge with people and gone out on Branson and attempted evangelism around town. I've had to learn how to climb gracefully up and down from the top bunk. I've begun to memorize the book of Philippians. In other words, I've had a lot of new experiences!
It's amazing to me that it's only been a week and half. My team is incredible. It's so amazing to see God's work so clearly through the girls that he put me with for the summer. We are all fairly different from each other, but are bonded together through our common love for Jesus. Everyone in the program is so eager to learn about how to be trained as warrior for Jesus. It's a contagious environment: one that has awoken me to my own lack of trust in Christ and see that HE is the ONLY thing that matters and will ever matter, and people's souls are real and being fought for and are worth my extra time to share His love intentionally and that it's dumb to be afraid of being thought of as odd. I'd rather be thought of as odd for my compassion and overflowing love from Jesus, than forever regret the moments that I could have spoken truth and love into someone's life. Regardless of this, it's amazing to understand the depth of Jesus' love for me and that he actually wants to work through me to bring others to him. What have I ever done to deserve the honor of seeing someone's eternity change before my eyes?! Incredible.
I'm incredibly excited for this summer. I have about eight more weeks left here in Branson, and they will continue to be stretching, but I am yearning to grow and be challenged, which has already begun to happen.
"And how can anyone preach unless they are sent? As it is written: 'How beautiful are the feet who bring good news!'" Romans 10:15
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Uncertainty
All the cool kids are doing it. I'm a cool kid too, right?
I've been arguing with myself for weeks now about whether I should start a blog or not and finally, on the last night of my month of summer at home, I decided to. Even if no one reads this, it will be therapeutic for me to digest through this summer's events. So here we go.
What about this summer is so monumental? Well, I'll tell you. I don't know. I mean, I can feel it in my heart that I will be changed two months from now in my outlook on life and its purpose, but I'm not sure what's going to happen between here and there. Tomorrow I will begin a summer training program with the Navigators. All I know is that I'll be working at an amusement park and when I'm not working, I'll be learning about Jesus in Bible study with my team and how to bring him to my campus when I return in the fall. Tomorrow afternoon I will be meeting thirty of my soon-to-be closest friends for the summer, even though I only know names and facebook profile pictures, and even that, I would be unable to match together. With this uncertainty, my pride and inhibitions come crashing down. I can't be confident in myself. In these times is when Jesus most evidently reveals his presence in my life. I've seen it this past year in moving to college, and I'm excited and nervous to experience it again.
Isaiah 41:10, 13
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand... For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you."
I know I will have many mornings where the dawn comes before I'm ready and many days that I feel like each second ticks by in slow motion. Physically, I'll want to be hot and tired and grouchy most of the time, but I'm praying I won't feel it. Jesus is more than capable to take my weaknesses and turn them into beautiful opportunities. I'll have many times where I won't want to spend time with Jesus because I'm too tired or I don't want to hear what he has to say because it hurts too much and it's not what I want to hear.
Isaiah 40:28-31
"Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."
The word "weary" is used four times in those three verses. Weariness can appear to be overwhelming, but when looked at with this promise, it is counteracted and overshadowed by words like "soar" and "power" and "strength". These are all promised with the Lord. Any time we're mentioned, it's with this promise that we will stumble, but God, the Creator of all things seen and not yet seen, will give us hope. And renewal. How beautiful!
Philippians 3:12-13
"I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
I don't know how to be content in every situation. I can be content when things are going well, but I don't know how to not be in want of a new day when I just had an awful one. I want to learn though and I know Jesus can teach me and give me that strength to be content .I think this is the secret, not to happiness, but to true joy in life. Contentment. What a peaceful excitement.
I embark on this journey to meet and encounter my Abba Father daily in ways I have never experienced. It will be hard. I'm nervous.
But I'm also ecstatic.
"And she smiles at the future." Proverbs 31:25
I've been arguing with myself for weeks now about whether I should start a blog or not and finally, on the last night of my month of summer at home, I decided to. Even if no one reads this, it will be therapeutic for me to digest through this summer's events. So here we go.
What about this summer is so monumental? Well, I'll tell you. I don't know. I mean, I can feel it in my heart that I will be changed two months from now in my outlook on life and its purpose, but I'm not sure what's going to happen between here and there. Tomorrow I will begin a summer training program with the Navigators. All I know is that I'll be working at an amusement park and when I'm not working, I'll be learning about Jesus in Bible study with my team and how to bring him to my campus when I return in the fall. Tomorrow afternoon I will be meeting thirty of my soon-to-be closest friends for the summer, even though I only know names and facebook profile pictures, and even that, I would be unable to match together. With this uncertainty, my pride and inhibitions come crashing down. I can't be confident in myself. In these times is when Jesus most evidently reveals his presence in my life. I've seen it this past year in moving to college, and I'm excited and nervous to experience it again.
Isaiah 41:10, 13
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand... For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you."
I know I will have many mornings where the dawn comes before I'm ready and many days that I feel like each second ticks by in slow motion. Physically, I'll want to be hot and tired and grouchy most of the time, but I'm praying I won't feel it. Jesus is more than capable to take my weaknesses and turn them into beautiful opportunities. I'll have many times where I won't want to spend time with Jesus because I'm too tired or I don't want to hear what he has to say because it hurts too much and it's not what I want to hear.
Isaiah 40:28-31
"Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."
The word "weary" is used four times in those three verses. Weariness can appear to be overwhelming, but when looked at with this promise, it is counteracted and overshadowed by words like "soar" and "power" and "strength". These are all promised with the Lord. Any time we're mentioned, it's with this promise that we will stumble, but God, the Creator of all things seen and not yet seen, will give us hope. And renewal. How beautiful!
Philippians 3:12-13
"I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
I don't know how to be content in every situation. I can be content when things are going well, but I don't know how to not be in want of a new day when I just had an awful one. I want to learn though and I know Jesus can teach me and give me that strength to be content .I think this is the secret, not to happiness, but to true joy in life. Contentment. What a peaceful excitement.
I embark on this journey to meet and encounter my Abba Father daily in ways I have never experienced. It will be hard. I'm nervous.
But I'm also ecstatic.
"And she smiles at the future." Proverbs 31:25
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